squirrilsama (squirrilsama) wrote in egl,
squirrilsama
squirrilsama
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Help a beginner lolita out?

 If this is not allowed, please feel free to remove it!

Hello! I've just recently re-discovered lolita and, more importantly, this blog,. Since many of you seem to be very experienced, I thought it would be a good idea to ask for some help before I go out and buy something I might regret due to poor quality, etc, and for advise on how to discuss the style with one's father (for I have a slightly different case than most)...



First and foremost, I would like a little help with choosing dresses! The current store I'm looking at is Fan Plus Friend, which I know can be very hit-and-miss, so I was hoping someone has bought some of the dresses I've been looking at. You must forgive me, I'm extremely paranoid and I like to get multiple views on things before I buy them, as I am very indecisive.
And before I put them up, I would like to mention I'm mostly interested in Classic and Country styles, so if anyone knows any other places (besides from Japanese brands, as I am too large to fit in most of their sizing and also too poor) to buy from, that would be wonderful! In order to keep this post from being absolutely clogged with pictures, I'll only post the stock images along with links of the dresses I would really like, and all others I'm interested in will only be linked.

Classical Lolita Spiral Steel Boned Corsage Dress & Choker Set


This dress looks absolutely precious! I'm just worried about the fabric quality on this, and that's what's holding me back...

Country Lolita Shirring Lacing Up "Hedge Rose" Dress&Headdress


Another cute dress! Still concerned about the fabric, and the sheer amount of print...I love some print, but sometimes there's just too much. Granted, I do like very minimal print, so..

Gothic Lolita Bias Trimmings Pearls Dress& Silk Skirt 2pcs Set

This has been one of my favourite dresses ever since I discovered their site! Even though it falls out of my preferred Classic style, I'm in love. Green looks so good! 
However, that silk looks super-duper shiny, and while that may just be the camera/lighting, it still worries me...

Lolita Troubadour: Boned Corset Dress& Vintage Lace Bustle Pinafore
Another one that falls out of the classic style, but I find it gorgeous nonetheless....but I am not sure if it would really count as lolita? Either way, aside from material concerns, I'd buy it in a heartbeat!

Gothic Lolita: Neat Square Collar Patch Trimming Dress
I am really digging the Victorian-era feel of this! Still the same material quality concerns as the other dresses...

Sweet Lolita "Unicorn Carriage" Polka Dot Dress/JSK
Yet another one that breaks away from the Classic style, but I cannot resist unicorns and polka dots in one. I would obviously go with the black dress on this one, since everything else is blinding...

That's all the dresses I have been looking at! I've, of course, been looking at blouses and skirts as well, but this is already very image heavy.
Any comments on these dresses would be very much welcome! I'm super paranoid shopping online, and F+F's hit-and-miss reputation makes me very nervous about buying from them!

 

My next major issue is with my father. Back in the beginning of May, I told my father (and mother) about me believing I was trangender - FtM. For a few weeks, I managed to dress and (I believe) pass semi-decently as my desired gender, but in recent weeks I have discovered that is not the case. After a lot of contemplation and discussion with my other Trans* friends, I have tentatively come to the conflusion that I was genderfluid, meaning that depending on the day, I may percieve myself as a boy, and on another as a girl, and, usually in my case, as A-gender (meaning having no desire to be either gender, basically), 

Now, my mother knows this, as I have told her, but unfortunately, I'm petrified of informing my father. If I show a desire to dress in very feminine clothing, he will attack me mercilessly and not-so-kindly inform me that I am a liar and should just stick to my assigned sex and gender, and I don't even want to think of what else.

He's not the most Trans*friendly man ever, obviously.

Now, I intend on buying at least a couple JSKs/OPs and blouses before my birthday and the beginning of the new school year (which is on the same day, oh joy), and have no intention on slowly easing myself into the style to get him to accept this. The moment I put a skirt on I will be put down, and I honestly would not be capable of handling that right before school begins, because I have enough anxiety and stress problems without him antagonizing things.

If anyone happens to have any advice on this matter, that would be so very, very nice! I honestly don't know how to handle him anymore...
 

And finally, does anyone know where I might find a pattern for a box-pleated skirt? I intend on sewing a high-waisted one for a Hufflepuff-inspired ensemble, and my mother and I are having a hard time finding anything similar that would get the right amount of poof for the skirt!

Thank you very much for your help in advance, and I'm very sorry that this whole mess was so long!

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Recent Posts from This Community

  • Unreleased Items You Wish Were Released?

    I was looking through some of my old (ouch) AP catalogs and in one of them from 2014 there was this marshmallow bag pictured with the re-release of…

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